Impatience and Lust

In his book Compassion, Henri Nouwen describes impatience (in this paraphrase of mine since I can't find my book to directly quote from) as a declaration that "now" is not good enough and as a failure to recognize a moment as full and rich.  We always think that if only this would happen now, or this other future thing would occur sooner, we would be satisfied.  But we find that when that thing finally comes, we're ignoring it only to look ahead further to the next thing that is just too far away.
And lust.  It's usually understood in one of it's more common specific uses, that of sexual lust, but the broader term here fits in with impatience.  That broader understanding of lust is the desire to believe in a lie.  Very often it is also a lie of future satisfaction that will take place if only we do something.  It's all very built on the "if only"- a declaration that something right now is not good enough.

A week or so ago, I thought to myself "if only I can hear back about whether not I'm into that masters program! Then, I'll be satisfied!"
Well, now I know.  I'm in.  Woo hoo.  Where's the satisfaction?  Impatience and lust whisper in my ear, "That's six months away!  Things will be so much better when it actually starts.  You'll be satisfied then... if only it can come sooner!"
False!  I will have homework and papers I don't want to write and other trash; they will come whispering again, "Just wait until summer or graduation when you can be free of all those terrible obligations..."  Again, false, real life exists and there will always be something to do and look forward too.  Where does it end?  Death?  Not ready for that.
I've got to start learning now that now is okay.  In fact it's great.  And I don't need to look for my satisfaction in something that is yet to come.  That's just gonna leave me empty and hungry and dying (literally) for the next thing.

You know that feeling you get when someone hints that another person whom you really respect likes you?  You get that kind of flutter and excitement and realize that you're important to someone really important.  Sometimes we forget that Someone Really Important thinks pretty highly of us and I think that's plenty to be satisfied about.