Here are my notes- hopefully they make sense... I don't really feel like writing it out in essay form.
Announcement of Word Made Flesh, Sierra Leone. But the job search wasn't such fun- Description of J-Term anxiety and feelings of woeful inadequacy.
Turn to prayer-
Psalm 42:5
Why are you downcast, my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him,
My Savior and my God.
through my daily liturgy, two phrases stand out: "Keep your servant from willful sins so they may not rule over me" and "Direct my footsteps according to Your Word; let no sin rule over me"
What was ruling over me? Want of a job, depending on resume, self worth based on how my friends treated me.
Psalm 199:133
Direct my footsteps according to your word;
let no sin rule (have dominion) over me. (shalat- to be master of, to be lord over)
I was trying to be lord of my life. In my weakness I was letting my desires have dominion over me. I was being steered by the enemy of self- in trying to save myself I was losing myself.
What do we submit to? (This is our god).
What do we have faith in? What do we put our full weight of being on/What do we rely on? (This is our god).
Real World Examples (or literature)
- Two Madoff investors and CFO of Freddie Mac recently committed suicide.
- Smaug the dragon in The Hobbit- When Bilbo stole a single golden cup from his hoard, "His rage passes description-- the sort of rage that is only seen when rich folk that have more than they can enjoy suddenly lose something that they have long had but never used or wanted."
- Mark Twain parodies a famous adage when he says "Put your all your eggs in one basket and watch that basket!"
What does the Bible have to say to those who depend on their own strength or let their self-worth ride on one material thing?
Proverbs 18:10-11
10 The name of the LORD is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe.
11 The wealth of the rich is their fortified city;
they imagine it an unscalable wall.
5 This is what the LORD says:
"Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
who depends on flesh for his strength
and whose heart turns away from the LORD.
6 He will be like a bush in the wastelands;
he will not see prosperity when it comes.
He will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
in a salt land where no one lives.
7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
8 He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."
How do we get to this place?
When Augustine loses a soul mate whom he relied on, he reflects, "Every soul is wretched that becomes bound in friendship to perishable things. The soul is torn apart when the thing loved is lost...I could not find relief in quiet forests, nor in loud games and music, nor in parties, nor in sexual pleasures, nor even in books or poetry."
These things are all perishable and the only route to joy is to find relief in the Imperishable. But of course, this is obvious and we all know it deep down. Yet we find ourselves at the bottom of that slimy pit, unable to put it into practice. Augustine empathizes, "When my soul retreated from life, a huge load of misery weighed me down. I should have raised my burden to You, O Lord, and You would have lightened it. I knew the truth, but I couldn't or wouldn't turn to You. For when I thought of You, You were not God to me."
These things that we submit to and rely on have become gods to us and they are powerless when we raise our burdens to them. We must make our God our god. (We must make the omnipotent YHWH the one that we submit to and rely on.)
How can we become like a tree planted by water/learn to submit to and rely on the LORD, to raise our burdens to Him?
Psalm 42:5
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God. >> or for the help of His presence. (NASB)
Hebrew "help" = yâshuw`ah = deliverance, salvation, Savior. Yeshua = Jesus
Jesus = Emmanuel = God is with us = "help of His presence" (!)
Therefore, we must:
Psalm 62:1-2
1 My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
2 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.
Ways we can actively engage in relying upon the LORD
- Take away something we rely upon
- Fasting (from food, indulgences, etc) - a good exercise in shifting our priorities
- Actively trust in Him
- "Biblical faith is like believing that it won't rain and then not taking an umbrella" (We must act upon our trust in Him and not focus our energies on backup plans "in case God doesn't come through")
- Prayer
- Raise our burdens to God
- Ask Him to help us in our realization that He is our Foundation
- AW Tozer:
Father, I want to know You, but my cowardly heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without inward bleeding, and I do no try to hide from You the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and have become a very part of my living self, so that You may enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shall You make the place of Your feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it for You shall be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. Amen.
